Sometimes its innocent and has no repercussions and is perfectly normal and not abuse. By sexually explicit comments, we mean repeated unwanted comments about the way in which your body looks, be it in private or in front of other people. Im scared maybe my stepdad did something to me. Its about not feeling good about something, and suffering stress and anxiety. When i search for the memories from this time it is very difficult to remember and almost painful or confusing. Also, depending on the way my partner plays with my nipples, i feel sick and instantly think of my mom. Im worried something may have happened there as well. Every time I get scared in the dark. My young mind was still developing, but I could tell this was something that wasnt right. Look for someone who deals with young people and trauma if you can.Hope that helps. Children often do play sexual games with other children. I feel dirty afterwards. Dont be afraid to call, that is what these sorts of charities are there for. Subjected to electro shock torture, the works. I never in a million years would have thought about getting raped But I had a dreamand I cant get this extreme fear and anxiety and somewhat of a face out of my head. My body has been unproportional and im handicapped. You talk about these things like self harming as things you used to do, so we are assuming the therapy helped. Its figuring out how to take care of yourself and sort out those symptoms so you can thrive. Common & Uncommon Sexual Development. I just dont know. Hi Rachel. It sounds like youve never been able to trust someone, which is a lonely way to live. I think I opened my mind to the possibility of sexual abuse having been happened to me when my mother made a comment in passing (which I was disgusted by) that when I was a toddler, my grandfather would pat, my diaper. It seems there was a traumatic experience with your cousin (which alone would be enough to cause other symptoms and for your brain to register a trauma). Or was she too young to know it was abuse? Not engaging in sex is more common than is talked about. My mom has said when I came home I was never the same as I used to be. Finally, just to point out that you are only sixteen. Doing something like THAT to your younger sister? In our experience, any good therapist would happily talk about fear of therapy. Gosh we are sorry to hear this was your experience Lisa. If you were abused, then therapy creates a safe space for any memories to come up, as well as how to learn how to navigate your symptoms like anxiety. Is there someone you can talk to about this? Answer: Yes it is possible to have been sexually abused as a child, to not remember it, and then to experience difficulty with intimacy and other 'symptoms' as an adult. I myself battled addictions to substances for years. Feeling disconnected from the body or always wanting to be clean can be the result of a childhood that was so out of control, for example, that the body becomes the only thing we can control, for example. It also sucks cus I have the worst relationship with my mom so I cant talk to her about it. my name is Dorcas i am 17 i was rape between 4-5 of age but the age is what is giving me problem. I tell him to stop and he just continues. The strange part is, I have no memory of how old I was? You say you have been to therapy. I have abandonment issues, trust issues, co dependency issues, depressed, suicidal thoughts since 12.. had tried to commit suicide, self harm, abusing drugs, alcohol, and have toxicity traits and tendencies. The best thing to do, if you are feeling unable to cope, is to seek support. Im worried that this could be some sort of sexual abuse thing, but Im not sure. Nothing inside the house or in the neighborhood changed, but it was as if my neighborhood, instead of running South to North was running from East to West. Theres an awful lot of judgement going on here. Are you going to step up and seek help and take care of yourself? If you ever feel really lost, do get in touch with the Good Samaritans, who provide free hotlines in both the UK and USA. Teresa, sexual abuse is sadly all too common, 1 in 4 children is the official statistic. Stepping out of victim mode means we realise we have power, power to decide to get better. Hi Merly, thanks for sharing. Founded in 2006, we are an award-winning group connecting you to highly experienced therapists in our London rooms and online worldwide. What if u think u might have been molested but u dont remember everything and sometimes u forget prices until something makes u remember and the person who did it was always drunk so u dont know if they remember and there sober now and each totally different around u,because I remember he used to touch my thies and he used to tickle me under my skirt or dress but hed put his hand a little too high up and it felt like he was rubing my vagina and he always offered me a drink so I soon became his drinking buddy and There was this one time I was in the dinning room looking out the window and I was only wearing a shirt and underwear and I felt something a little wet and warm touch my back and when I turned back around he was fixing his underwear so I dont really know what happened there and I was looking at the symptoms that are listed and I have almost all of them and I can only masturbate to forced to fuck porn and daddy forces daughter porn and every time I watch it I start to cry unconciusly like theres a tear but Im not aware of it until it starts streaming down my face and I feel really bad after Im done watching my porn and through out most of my memories about stuff like that I start to lose memory or the memory gets blury. These are things that need to be dealt with, and if you cant stop the worry yourself, its a good idea to reach out for support. Do you have trouble showing affection towards others? one night my father came into my room, he laid in bed with me and gave me a small plastic heart and told me whenever you look at this heart remember that i love you. If you are looking for permission to blame your family, thats a bit trickier, and worth looking at how that will help you or hinder you before engaging in. Or a mother who strips a child and makes them stand naked in their room for hours as punishment for being bad. Read our article for many ideas on finding low cost help here http://bit.ly/lowcosttherapy. But I can only continue to recognize what happened and be a better version of me than I have been. No. Hi Anon, we suggest you read through other comments and read our connected article, I Think I was Abused as a Child What to Do Now. I feel like Im just being stupid. And as I acknowledge that I definately have one Im wondering whether I started being like this because a sexual assault event i cant remember triggered it. I know i have alot of issues. We have an article here on how to ask parents for support. Even when he was arrested, the only thing I remember about that day was my Mum crying at the dining table surrounded by police officers. Unfortunately, if you dont have any memories, and even in the case of someone who does have some disconnected memories, until someone creates a time machine we cant prove anything. When I started to bring it up in therapy, it was seen as another manifestation of my mental illness. When it comes to sex. We were in the garage and were kind of hiding behind a standing tool box. We even have clients starting therapy in their 70s. Red Flags in a Relationship Quiz. We wish you courage. You are only 17, and its important to listen to your feelings on this front Its your body, and there is no rule or timeline to anything, beyond what feels right for you. Sexual abuse can cause long-term issues in your behaviours, relationships, and sex life, as well as in the ways you treat yourself. The problem with coping mechanisms it that they then become entrenched habits. is there anyway i can get into this and try and figure out what happened? Hi Dani, thank you for this honest sharing. I always got hit as a kid for bad behaviour and I dont think it really affected me just made me think twice before I acted. It was always about pleasing the other person before I got married. Hi Donna, that sounds really hard. Although its common to assume it must be a father figure, that is not necessarily true, although it is a strange thing you recount. But Im starting to realize that I have an intense sexual drive. I was made to give him oral sex on more than a couple occasions. Ive been very sexual though since as long as I can remember but as far back as that memory goes, I dont remember anyone doing anything to me. My mom showed me her notes she wrote down of our behavior back then and the hospital report cuz mom took me to hospital to have doc look at area to see if there was signs of being molested, but I would not allow anybody to get close to that area I wouldnt let them take pants and underwear off and was crying so no exam done. We were both really provocative at a young age, we would play games that had to do with having boyfriends and having sex with them. Hi. Anytime a man takes an interest in being with me, Im flattered, but also scared stiff and want to run away and hide. A little more than a year ago, when I was 16, I started having dreams that there was someone on top of me, someone in my bed, or someone choking me. I was 15 with no experience but in back of my head was a voice saying i was dirty and that i wasnt a virgin. I dont know who would/could have hurt me, but the more I think about this, the more I really start to worry and remember. If youre questioning if you were sexually abused, take this Was I sexually abused? quiz and find out. That continued for years. If so, gather up your courage and go elsewhere. Which can often have a strong bias that is not in favour of the client. For starters, congratulate yourself for getting by at all, and for being brave enough to be here sharing. We reject friends, colleagues, partners, and yes, therapists. Moving on to the rest. I didnt want to. I knew it wasnt OK but I didnt know what to do so I did nothing. But they have a fear of there mother because the story always gets destroyed when she is involved. The horrible part is my first time I dont think was my first time. Being a teenager is also hard, your brain is growing and your hormones are changing. Wow, thank you all for all the comments and replies. A counsellor or therapist WILL take you seriously. If anyone could help bring into light whether or notsomething actually happened, itd really help. This can all happen as soon as the first appointment and without any discussion of trauma at all. My mom would still let me stay the night and the molesting would happen again and again and again. For instance, I remember my sister and I playing a card game where you would have to lose a piece of clothing for each round you lost, and I lost, and somehow, I ended up in a closet naked, and my father found me in there. Im just really needing to know what actually happened and if I was molested more than 1 time or what was going on. 1. And really I do not want this txt to be published, I would just be glad to receive professional really smart help. Please help me to get answers. So I never brought it up ever again. I have had OCD most of my life, and I have trichotillomania, which in some cases indicates abuse. I did also self harm cause the thoughts were being too much. But I dont want to go on never knowing for sure and being confused. Yet, sometimes the abuse is so subtle that you don't realize you're being abused.
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